If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
whose ass print is on the piano?
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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