hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
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