i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
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