we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Randomize
