so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
I need to do something profound in the next three and a half years so that when my kids ask what I did in my twenties I have something to say other than "made bad decisions"
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
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