I don't usually arrange sex via text message
If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
Randomize
