i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
If you don't answer the phone then I will be forced to leave you a wonderful voicemail of me throwing up
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
Randomize
