Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
this is an emotional support booty call
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
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