So I answered the door in my underwear expecting my boyfriend. Instead I opened the door to Mormon missionaries. Do you think that was a sign from God?
I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
Dude I woke up in her bed wearing a top hat and bunny slippers and noticed one of us had pissed in bed. The last thing I wanted to ask for was a ride home
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
I just made kick ass drunk stir fry while taking care of three other drunk people and doing shots. I don't understand how that's not wife material
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
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