Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
We tried to break her futon, I crushed my balls instead. You have one less reason to be jealous that my balls are insanely huge and yours are not.
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
Randomize
