He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
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