good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago