2:45a: Any chance you got 3000 bucks on you?
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
I don't know whether to be insulted or flattered that I am being propositioned to have a threesome only if I wear my cat onesie
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
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