FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
he had hair everywhere except his balls
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
Fuck you. Fuck this party. I just wanted to be pretty with a cute little tiara and boys sucking my tits, now i have a hangman game drawn on my face and jello shots in my hair.
I wanted to give you a great birthday party. You know I did.
Randomize
