dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
Randomize
