im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
New realization: eye makeup remover takes sharpie off boobs
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
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