I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
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