WOAH SHIT! That wasn't my girlfriend last night.
U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
he puts the penis in happiness.
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
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