i permit you to call me
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
Don't need my thirties to be known as the decade of "new types of shits from drinking" like last night.
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
Randomize
