I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
No work today. I woke up and someone had written "Markhot Penis = Party" on my forehead in sharpie. Do you know a Mark?
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
Randomize