he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
The awkward moment your booty call shows up to the Mexican restaurant and realizes you just picked burritos over pussy
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
Randomize
