Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
Randomize
