Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude.
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
Randomize
