Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
Randomize
