Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
Seriously, I look like I crawled out of a bog. Succeeding at being as undateable as possible.
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
Randomize
