Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
I haven't been this sober since birth.
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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