i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
I just had one of those nervous system things in my thumb...I'm pretty sure I have cancer.
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
Apparently I used ziplock bags to smuggle my drink out with. By pouring it in one, then cut the corner like it was an icing bag later that night. What is wrong with me?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
Randomize