Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
he just fucked me for my cheese.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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