Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
You were sitting at the bus stop holding hands with some Polish girl you just met, who was just as drunk as you were, and you kept trying to light your Kit Kat and smoke it.
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
You blacked out and walked in on my neighbor breast feeding at 3am yelling "where is my best friend". I think we should go apologize.
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
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