hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
We just shotgunned beers for America
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
Comedy Central is in dire need of more sitable faces late at night - Trevor Noah has a baby face - there are federal rules against those types of sexual fantasies
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Randomize
