idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
Dude, you need to talk to your mom
wtf?
She just called and asked if i would be part of the intervention she's planning for you
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
I told you I couldn't sleep because of the speed and you rolled over and replied "shh. just pretend."
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
Randomize
