Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
Listen, don't freak out when you walk out on me masturbating in front of my roommate. No homo. He just needs to be put to his place.
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays.
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
My brother really should've known better than to make me go egg hunting with his daughter when I was entirely too drunk to do so. Threw up in a plant in front of her.
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
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