i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
Randomize
