I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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