I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I miss the days of selfishly blowing a load in the condom without her knowing and acting all like "we shouldn't do this" so she would get dressed and leave.
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
You don't understand. On her lunch break she sits on the roof, stares into the sky, and chain smokes. I can't get on her level. She is made up of java monsters with whiskey and a voice that sounds like sex.
You need to stop crushing on your boss or fuck her.
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
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