So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
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