I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
Randomize
