apparently farting at a cop is considered assault.
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
Randomize
