we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
Yoooooo, the fat magician married the chick I dumped a beer on after I got pissed he was flirting with her in front of me
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