So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
that's the second time you've been mistaken as a prostitute. maybe life is trying to tell you something
its my fault though, i'm wearing tights
you're hiking in tights? you remind me of dennis quaid's fiance in the parent trap
I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
no
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
We told the pizza man that the door was most likely unlocked, he could leave the pizza on the counter and give himself 20%. He did it-I'm never moving out of Aspen.
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Randomize
