If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
I'm out of milk so I'm dunking my Oreos in Bailey's; this is my life now.
drunk me cartwheeled over a turtle sandbox & slit my foot open on a cinder block. how do you explain that to a doctor?
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
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