I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
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