Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
Randomize
