You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
It was laundry day and I was wearing last xmas undies. he took one look and went...you's a ho, ho, ho. my response you ask? for less dough, dough, dough. I'm a slut.
with a sacreligious after taste.
A girl just asked me to co-sign for her boob job because she didn't have enough credit built up. This is a first.
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
This is my life. Enjoy the view
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
Randomize