i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
Randomize
