I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
Three questions. How does a tomato drive a car, how does an asparagus play a guitar, and how am I still so high that I chose to watch Veggie Tales?
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
i thought to myself 'what a productive day'. then i realized all ive done is one load of laundry and shaved my balls.
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
Walking in to my alcoholic Assessment meeting with a black eye = 40% awkward 60% awesome
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Randomize
