I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
The bartender let me pay my bar tab with my itunes giftcards.
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
Somewhere between the 2 hours of sex and her urgently rushing to work she manged to steal all $329.33 in my jeans. Worst one night stand ever, she even took the pennies.
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
I will be naked everywhere
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
Apparently last night I yelled "the cops were called on a mother fucker and that mother fucker is me." And then proceeded to exorcise a sandwitch.
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children