im sorry i hit your dog last night,,,i didnt even see it
I dont have a dog?
WTF
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
i can't believe you were mixing vodka with green tea last night and enjoying it.
i should bottle and sell it. my slogan could be "green tea vodka. antioxidating while intoxiacting. your liver will thank you. "
I was sat at the table waiting with a glass of wine reading my book and the hotel staff gave me a goldfish in a bowl and said 'heres your date for the night' !
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
Randomize
