a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
Took her home last night and it was like trying to put an oyster in a slot machine. I may have drank a little too much.
I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
Randomize