i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
SHE BROUGHT HER PARROT TO THE PARTY. IT SQUAWKS EVERY TIME SOMEONE VOMITS LIKE 'PARTY FOUL SQUAWKKKKKK'
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
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